Top Ten Reason Ranch Trucks are Never Stolen

10. They only have a range of 20 miles before they break down or run out of gas.

9.   Only the owner knows how to operate the door.

8.   It is difficult to drive fast with all the fence tools, grease rags, ropes, chains, syringes, buckets, boots, hay, and loose papers flying around the cab.

7.   It takes too long to start and the smoke coming up through the rusted-out floorboard clouds your vision.

6.   The Border Collie on the toolbox looks mean.

5.   They’re too easy to spot.  The description given to the sheriff: “The driver’s side door is red, the truck is green.” 4.   The large round bale in the back makes it hard to see if you’re being chased.  You could use the mirrors if they weren’t cracked and covered with duct tape.

3.   Top speed is only 45 mph.

2.   Who wants a truck that needs a year’s worth of maintenance, $3,000 in body work, tail lights and a windshield?

1.   It is very difficult to commit a crime when everyone is waving at you!

Leave a Reply